It’s been 6 months since my decision to recreate myself, retake control of my future and chart my own path. While I have been sick this entire week and that may have been clouding my mindset, given the not so positive thoughts in my head, it seems it’s time to Re-Examine and take a step forward. There are a few themes I want to dig into today.
This past month I have come to a significant realization. Something significant has changed in how I am working and dealing with my own thoughts and behaviors. One of the significant things that I am recognizing this month is that I am not judging myself for mistakes, missteps and falling into traps as much as the past. Rather, I am observing and recognizing the behavior and patterns. I am seeking the positive in those situations and identifying what I have learned and if it is new or different from the past. Removing that judgment allows me to simply acknowledge what I am experiencing and recognize that this is a pattern instead of a fault. Removing judgement allows me to be OK with whatever it is and creates a positive state to start addressing it, or if it is a repeated thing, to assess and try a different approach.
The other thing I am recognizing right now is simply fear of failure and how that has impacted me in my life. As I scheme and prepare for taking a next step towards my newly crafted future, I gotta be open, I am fearful I might fail. To be honest, that is actually one of the reasons I am pushing forward. If I flip this situation and vision I am creating on its head and simply see the positive, focus on what I will learn, and believe that even if it doesn’t pan out the way I scripted it, this pursuit will open doors, bring me to new places and introduce me to new people and opportunities. In many ways, I think the pursuit of something and the journey that comes with that pursuit is the thing I miss the most. It’s the thing I need and crave.
Lastly, I want to share something I have written about in the past. Change the conversation. In those moments of recognition of falling into old traps and habits, it’s time to change the conversation. Quit trying to deal with them the exact same way as you have in the past. What is a new approach? Is there a different viewpoint to approach the conversation? We as humans have proven the past two years during the global pandemic that we are far more capable of adapting and changing than we ever thought? What if we allow ourselves to simply look at a situation differently or try something different in hopes of getting a different result.
Thanks for sitting with me through these thoughts. Maybe you are wondering where this is headed? As I prepare to head out next week to learn some new skills, re learn something I learned 30+ years ago and test some ideas, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little bit nervous. In this process to push and learn, those old, negative thoughts of failure and should I just go back to work for some business or business owner somewhere crept into my sick and fatigued body & mind this week. Thankfully the past 6 months of work on my mental and physical development have given me the tools and capability to push beyond and not fall into those old traps. Will this new adventure I am on be the one? Who the heck knows, but its gonna be fun proving it out either way.
Have a good weekend. It’s time for me to go play in the fresh snow a bit and take some pictures.